First of all, kudos to you for having the guts to continue to work on yourself. Having kids is one chapter of your life. It plays a part in the rest of the pages, but it isn’t your whole life. It’s okay to want to continue growing and to make room for that. If you’re reading this, you understand the importance of investing in yourself and your future. This investment can provide benefits for your kids. That being said, how do we keep it all together for them and balance school?
1. Pick Classes You Can Handle
This isn’t the time to be Wonder Woman and pack every class imaginable into your first semester. This is the time to test the water before stepping in. You want to start slow and get the hang of balancing school, childcare, and everything else first. This isn’t like pre-baby days when you could stay up to 2 am and cram studying European History. You actually need time to learn now, and that means having time outside of work and school days set aside. Being part-time is a great way to create a flexible schedule. Taking half-semester classes also helps. Looking for hybrid and night classes can let you continue knocking out credits. The great thing about these options is that they put the school in Beginner mode. You can always add classes and jazz up your schedule if you have the room after the first semester.
2. Childcare!!!
It is not enough to have someone watch the kids while you are in class. You also need that extra time to get work done, remember? Many campuses these days actually have a daycare facility attached (usually for teachers and healthcare majors) to take advantage of. If not, you may get lucky and have extra grant money that can go towards part-time care. Keep an eye out for the signs of another mom in your class. There’s nothing better than two moms who study together. #mompower.
As for me, I didn’t have access to full-time childcare until halfway through my second year of school. Having to balance watching my son until my mom could pick him up meant learning that Netflix and YouTube were not the enemy if it meant I could finish my assignments. I also took every opportunity to find other parents in class and build a relationship with the professors. Their knowing that you are late because of parental duties always feels better than them thinking you don’t prioritize their class. It made me human and gave me a green flag for wearing sweats in class or having yogurt on my jacket every once in a while. School is possible without daycare! It just takes planning and a good tv show for homework.
P.S. A lot of daycares offer scholarships for single moms, especially if they’re in school! Be sure to ask while touring daycares. They may also be able to give you a discount and work with your schedule if you work there. I know I’ve been offered 50% off childcare tuition in exchange for working there.
3. Don’t Rush! School will still be there.
You are going to school for you, not anyone else. Go when you feel ready. If that means waiting for baby to be a little older, wait. If that means going now, go now. Rushing into school after becoming a mom has to be something you feel called to or you will be emotionally and mentally burned out. Going for what you love is worth waiting for and makes going to school feel like a break from your parental responsibility instead of the chore it used to be in [insert your worst high school subject here]. It’s supposed to be fun and empowering, not debilitating. So take your time and make sure you’re choosing a major or degree that’s worth it, and that you can handle. Believe in yourself, even if you are believing for core credits until you can afford more. That counts too.
4. *Bonus Tip* Get Started Early
Don’t wait for school to start studying. Brushing up on the class you’re taking beforehand: math, history, design, and literature. Doing this will make those first weeks stress-free rather than new and anxiety-wrought. Also, gathering supplies you know you’ll need early will keep textbooks from feeling like a huge investment.
Community Colleges can be great tools for preparing for a University. They often provide access to the software needed, discount books, and cheaper tuition. I was able to get almost two grand in excess financial aid to put towards childcare and supplies. Knowing my course plan ahead of time, scheduling classes, and preparing for the week with my employers kept me from getting overwhelmed with scheduling conflicts and last-minute adjustments. As a mom, the last thing I want to be worried about is the schedule, so I made sure it was perfectly organized. All I have to focus on is getting to class, finishing my work, and making sure my little one is taken care of in the meantime.
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